Spring Break!

Sorry I have not updated in a while! Things have been very busy for me. This past week has been spring break and I have been making the most of it!

First, my mom and I took our annual spring break trip to Destin, Fl. We have so much fun together and it is the only time that she and I can just have time to do whatever we want and is totally uninterrupted. We get to do a lot of shopping, eating lots of good food, and of course soaking up the sun! I love that time I get with her so much and we always have a great time. 

This year was especially important because with the IVF process about to begin, I know I will not get another opportunity to relax like that for a long time. So, while I am on the subject, I am going to vent for a moment. The waiting is KILLING me!!! I have never wanted my period to start so bad in all my life! Everyday I keep hoping that today is the day, but nothing. Waiting sucks! Mother Nature BRING IT ON ALREADY!!!!!   

Now to the next thorn in my side, the day I came home from my vacation, Michael and his EX has gotten into a huge fight really of stupid stuff, but whatever. This rarely happens anymore, but when it does, they are usually knock down drag out arguments. She drives me crazy! I have always tried to be there for her, be her friend. Now I know all of that means nothing to her. I guess it never has. I am so hurt by her right now I can't even stand it! She actually said that my family, including myself, was not Gabe's "real family". Anyone who knows me, knows that is the craziest comment ever! I love that child with all my heart, as if he were my own. My family feels the same way. It breaks my heart beyond words that she would not be so thankful that Michael found someone that cares so much. I suppose its jealousy of her own loneliness or fear that if and when another baby comes my feelings for Gabe would change. But that could not be farther from the truth. In my eyes he will always be my first child. From now till forever. 

I am a good person, I try hard to take care of others before myself. I have always tried to be a good person to my husband's ex-wife because I want Gabe to have a happy family. All of his family included. I am not sure why some people act the way they do, but words really do hurt!

Well, now that I have gotten that out, I am going to go back to cleaning house and enjoying my last day of spring break! This whole bogging thing is very therapeutic.  

Happy Spring Everyone!

Ready for spring

This has been a bad few days. I have not been sleeping well and I don't think I have completely recovered from all of the the stuff that happened with my mom last week. To make matters worst, the weather has been horrible! It has been cold and rainy for days. I am not good with cold weather, but cold and rainy... I think I could kill myself! (not literally of corse) 

On a brighter note, next week at this time I will be packing my bags for sunny florida. I am very excited! I think this will be one of our more relaxed trips because I don't think my mom will be able to go,go,go like we normally do. I guess we will just have to wait and see. Regardless, Destin is my favorite place in the whole world and I just can't wait to get there. Hopefully it will cheer me up.

On the baby front, the waiting is harder than I thought and I have got to stay off the internet. I keep reading all the stories of others that have gone through this with happy endings and others with not so happy endings. I take each story to heart and in one minute I feel confident and then I read the next and I feel like there is no hope. One thing is always constant, this whole this is just one big roller coster of emotions.

Good news!

Today was a big day! I had to go see my doctor today to have a mid-cycle ultrasound done. My doctor told me that everything looked PERFECT! I was so excited! It has been a long time since I left that office with good news. So now it is just sit and wait. Not my favorite thing to do, but I feel so much more confident that everything is going to work out. It was just such a relief.

My mom is feeling much better too. She went with me to my appointment today. You would have thought she was going on a major vacation. She's not much of a home body and has not been out of the house for a week. It was funny. After my appointment we celebrated at the Gap Outlet! Always fun times!

It is only 1 1/2 weeks to SPRING BREAK 09! Mom and I are getting so excited for our annual trip. I am starting to pull out some of my spring clothes, but no matter how hard I try, I will be up late the day before we leave trying to pack! I can smell the beach already.....ahhhhhh

The UNEXPECTED

I am so tired, but I can't sleep, so I decided to quickly blog about the past couple days. 

First, on Thursday morning I got a phone call about 5am. (I just want to say that any phone call that early in the morning is never good.) It was my dad. He said he was taking my mom to the hospital because she was having chest pains. This had been going on for a few days off and on, but she thought that it was just heartburn from something she had eaten. My Mom never goes to the doctor, so I knew she had to be feeling really bad to wake my Dad to take her. Of course the next thing running through my mind was the seriousness of the situation. The heart is not a part of your body that you mess with! I have seen so many people have so many problems because of their hearts not working right. I did not want to see my Mom go through that.

They ran several tests and after almost 12 hours we finally found out the problem! My Mom had Gall Stones and had to have her Gall Bladder removed. We were very relieved that it was not her heart but my goodness, do you think they could have been any slower? It was a very stressful day for everyone!

That brings us to today, she was taken in to pre-op at about 9:30 this morning, to have it removed,  and everything was not finished and her back in her room until 2:00 this afternoon! All I can say is the sitting and waiting and wondering is almost more than I can stand. However in the end she came through with flying colors. The doctor did say that it was really bad and the stones were quite large, so no wonder she was feeling the way she did! By this evening she looked better and you could tell she was feeling better too.

When things like this happen and you get those "unexpected" calls it can really make you stop and think about things and how much you love and appreciate the people who are around you. I have decided to make it one of my new goals to let people I care about know that. I want them to know how much I appreciate them. Because even though this unexpected event worked out for the better, the next one may not be that way. 

I am just very blessed that my Mom is ok and hopefully will be back on her feet in time for our annual mother- daughter spring break trip! 

 I love you MoM!!!

A big day...

Ok, so today was a big step in the right direction. Michael and I had to go to our IVF class. This is the first step in the whole crazy process. The whole time I was sitting there listening to all the information I was thinking, I can not believe I am here. I can not believe this is finally about to happen! I have so may feeling going on right now, it is so crazy that it is funny.

I have to go back next week to have an ultrasound done. It is just a check-up, but other than that, it is just wait time. That part totally sucks! I am so tired sitting around waiting. Oh well at least spring is right around the corner and that always keeps me busy. I am so excited about the warmer weather coming our way this weekend!!!

Memories

This was such a fun weekend! I got to celebrate my 10 year class reunion.  I got to take a small walk down memory lane. It was so much fun. My Best Friend Kerri came into town for the special day and to celebrate her birthday. We really have not got to spend any time together in a LONG time. It was like we have not missed a page. I guess that's what true friends are like. So it was so much fun getting ready together and going to the reunion together. I don't think I could have imagined it any other way (except if Heather could have been with us.)  I had the best time! Another milestone in my life has come and gone. Life goes so fast and I still have so many things I want to accomplish. I guess I better get to work!

 Well long story short,Kerri and I both looked and felt awesome. It was great!